Add Ruskis on Ruski candid camera.

And Cleavage.

Internet Gold.  GOLD!

Via Gizmodo

Luxury, African Style

Unfortunately some people bring their luxury tent attitudes with them and this resort would be no different- an older caucasian lady who seemed like she was perhaps from the old school mentality of the south or bible belt was sitting with a group of ladies across from us.  I inherited my nosey gene from my mom’s side and I could overhear the conversation at the table and could tell they were likely strangers before this trip.  She appeared to be part of a group tour where they took random pairs of people and paired them up in a safari jeep to keep their overall cost down.  She was definitely belle of the ball as she wore not-so-safari-appropriate leisure suit and a face full of make-up to dinner with her hair in an antiquated yet high-maintenance style.  I dubbed her  the missing member of the Golden Girls.

Based on her treatment of our most gracious dinner staff I was able to immediately gather that this lady would be on my shit list after hearing her speak for only 2 minutes.  You have to realize that we are in Africa and the staff is not only doing its best to be pleasing to their clientele, but they have put an extraordinary amount of effort to learn the english language to be more accommodating.  The language barrier only served to annoy and frustrate GG #6 and she spoke so rudely I was embarrassed for Americans everywhere.

“Now I’ve told you with the dessert you always bring me too much!  I only want 1 cookie, I DONT NEED 3!  Do you understand me?”

You can imagine my glee when we started day 5 when at breakfast the painted lady was describing her horror that an animal was in her tent.  I gestured over to her table for Karl, Julie, and Carrie to listen in and we apparently Golden Girl had her tent opened and a baboon proceeded to steal the cake the staff implored her to NOT bring back to her tent and defecate on her open suitcase full of clothes in the process.

Maybe it was his way of saying:

So I googled “Happy Asian Man” and this is what came up.  Here’s to you Mr. Pooping Baboon.

We did our best to not make it so obvious that we were enjoying her misfortune.  I laughed my ass off.  Hey, haters gonna hate!

Trolololololololo

Even our breakfast was impressed, just ask Mr. Fingerling Potato:

When Chriss picked us up for the game drive we told him the baboon story and he said he had heard- I guess the staff wasn’t much of a fan of her either so they were likely high-fiving in the staff lounge.

What a good start to the day, BABOON POOP WIN!

New animal encounters of the day would be the hippos and a crocodile basking in the sun.

Just like in zoos, crocs don’t do much- lazy bastards:

We were fortunate enough to witness a couple of giraffes duking it out for superiority:

And got stuck in the mud but helped out:

The oddly put together Hyrax would make our acquaintance.  Julie, Karl, and Carrie weren’t too fond of trying to walk past these guys when they were basking at arm’s length (and face length being high up on rocks).  I thought they were ok and got closer.

Carrie stayed up on her photography game:

I decided our pictures were getting boring so I decided to spice things up:

and

and

“What’s that you say, pics getting boring?”  I guess I musta said that too loud because a ready and willing giraffe was ready to change all of that.

The highlight of day 5 (aside from the Baboon story) was by far another close encounter of the wild animal kind.  We were enjoying our boxed lunch (as much as one can enjoy a boxed lunch) when we saw a giraffe in the distance about 50 yards away which is pretty close by Safari standards.

Oh that’s just the beginning!

The giraffe took no issue with the picnicking humans and meandered his way towards us, tree by tree until he was snacking on the very tree that was providing us shade.

I think by far the most surprising thing about the safari is the seemingly unfettered up-close-and-personal access we’ve had.  First the elephant attack, then the lion right under our jeep, and now the giraffe.  So dope.

This dummy got a lil too close:

We spent the rest of the day searching and searching for the Cheetah.  I mean REALLY searching!

The cheetahs would elude us this day, but we headed back and winded the day down with beers and cards (crazy 8′s son!) and salty rice crackers over Drake’s new album.  Drake’s first album served as my daily soundtrack for Japan last year and it seemed his new one would help me pass the somewhat slow nights on the African Savannah.

It rained a bit

And Cholo Julie would make an appearance.  Lean like a cholo!

Lifehacker

Not player.

Chicago trumps New York and San Francisco as a shopping town because I feel like to see what you need to see in SF or NY you have to travel a million places.  The following shops are relatively nearby and I think they benefit from the proximity.

Honorable Mention: St. Alfred’s

Cool cats, store was a lil predictable but I had a nice convo with the cats there- one used to live in Berkeley and so we had a few rounds of “Oh is this spot still there…”

5.  Leaders1354

It was the spot that everyone told me to go to so I was expecting to be wowed.  It was a decent shop and the guy that helped me was super talkative and helpful.  The store honestly had a feel like St. Alfred’s but I feel like their original designs were better plus they had a pair of Air Mags in the house (and stored a lil close to the door IMO- smash and grab anyone?)

Yours for the low price of $5 Racks!

4.  Akin

Akin makes the list because they had a bunch of dope vintage Jordan stuff.  I mean OG I’s in the window?

OG Gatorade bottles (probably taste like Pruno by now, get you wassssted…)

PE’s on the mannequin?

Story from the kid in the shop was that his uncle was a super Jordan-head and basically stocked all this Jordan memorabilia up and had enough gusto to put a store together.  Extra points go out to them for having roots in the bay (Fremont.)

3.  Urban Outfitters Outlet

Forget what yelp says, this store is the truth.  $5 racks on racks on racks!

$5 Conan the barbarian shirt!  Yes Please (COPPED!)

$39.00 Herschel Camo Heritage Pack (perfect for Coachella) COPPED!

$3 Frank Ocean ‘Swim Good’ inspired Panda hat!  Yes Please!

See u in your nightmares!

2.  RSVP Gallery

RSVP lived up to the hype.

It’s more destination than shopping destination.  A lot of the stuff is sorta out of reach, so I just took this souvenir:

If you wanna get saucy you can pick up a Don C original “$150″ for $400 (Do that math JOHN!):

As seen on Jay’s noggin in the ‘Otis’ video:

It’s #2 because it’s exactly how I’d make a shop if I had the chance.  Down to the fanboy logo:

 

1.  Jugrnaut

Jugrnaut earns #1 honors because the store was different (like I said St. Alfred’s and Leaders felt almost identical) and the guys were super cool.  They had the most original designs, and they even got me to shell out for the Rick Ross cheeky play on the bathing ape logo.  I actually didn’t get it until I saw the lil Jugrnaut logo where the (R) is typically located on the BAPE logo.

Becomes:

Becomes:

Bowse!

‘The Jim’ is the most iconic shoe of the former skate giant- this time redone with a rather good rendition (at least in pictures) of pebbled leather basketball.  Dunno if I’d buy, but they catch the eye.

Skate shoe turned basketballer?  Sounds like a familiar allegory.

$85

Comes in tennis ball too!

We’re gonna skate to one song and one song only…

I have too many shoes.  More than any man needs.  More than any woman needs.  So I have a mini-goal for myself.  To buy only 3 kicks in 2012.  So…

I’m gonna buy 3 shoes and 3 shoes only….

The Chicago X

Ironically I compose this post thanks to a chromebook and gogo in flight innanet en route to Chi-City.

The X has always had a lil spot in my heart.  Accolades on the bottom.  A Pip endorsement.

I’ll need these.

Jordan IV Cement 

One of the most heralded of the Jordan line.  I’ve got the Militarys but I mostly slept on the IV.

Mostly.

Not in 2012.

Yeezy II’s

It’s easier to catch Bin Laden than a pair of the Yeezy’s.  I may come out of my “I don’t camp out” slumber for these.  We’ll see.

It gets the people going!

But Nike somehow ($) assembled every famous person alive to push Kobe’s shoe.

Kanye. Jerry Rice. Aziz. SIR RICHARD BRANSON. etc.

As always props to the geniuses at Nike.

11. Spotify

On July 14 2011 Spotify the long clamored for all-you-can-eat music service launched.

On July 14 2011 I ended my Mog subscription and became a Spotify Guy.  $9.99 a month is a drop in the bucket considering every Tuesday I used to head down to target and plop down my money for 2-3 cd’s at $9.99 a pop.

It’s better than stealing and I’ve got 15 million tracks at my fingertips.

10.  Bowties

Most days I feel like I’m debonair like Don Draper,

but know I look more like Lane Pryce, and I’m ok with that.

If you watch Mad Men you know Lane is a BEAST!

What's with the tie? You need a BOW TIE son!

Late in 2011 I began a collaboration with an old buddy of mine Bowtie Ben and I’m while it’s still in its infancy I know that 2012 has big things in store.

So allow me to begin the bowtie onslaught and check out our Facebook and Blog.

And of course you’ll need to start practicing, natch!

Best part is they show you how to gracefully take it off- which if you wear our bowties, you will be doing a lot of (for the ladies of course!)

Photo Credit: Casey Mackenzie Photography

9.  Nicekicks

When I was heavy into bodybuilding kicks and clothes took a major back seat.  I was one of the early Niketalk adopters back when Slam magazine had obscurely mentioned their board in the editors notes 1000000 years ago.  When the Iron took over, gym rat chic was my steez and as long as it included a tight shirt I didn’t really care.

As I eased off the fitness obsessing I was reacquainted with a new Niketalk but boy was it hard to follow.  Plus I just wanted the gist, not to talk at length about a shoe.

The homie Jake at work put me up on a NiceKicks which basically spoonfed the info you’d typically have to scour NikeTalk.  Elegant design and clean layout.  Mike and I are often in awe of the site because if you look away from your RSS for a minute, next thing you know they got 700 new posts.

It’d help me track the 2011 Foamposite Retro Release.  6 pairs copped.  3 of them sold.  BEAST.

8.  J Crew

When I fall I fall hard- my brand allegiance is dogged and my list is fairly short.

Nike.

Oakley.

LRG.

Vans.

Louis Vuitton.

It’s not that I won’t mess with other brands, but when a company enters the inner sanctum they rarely leave.  In fact I think Abercrombie and Fitch was the first to enter the inner circle and get booted out.  With the help of my personal shopper turned good homie Devan (“I got a guy”), 2011 saw a new entry.

J. Crew.

Their fit, quality, and craftsmanship.  I picked up the Wallace and Barnes Big Basin plaid at the NY Liquor store and it has been my favorite shirt ever since:

I am sad every time I pass it by in the closet when I have to say “Ryan, you just wore that shit brah!!”

7.  Macbook Air

Gizmodo calls it the best ultraportable lappy and even won the “Most important gadget of 2011″ award.

I call it happy 30th bday from Birdie.  I still stop and look at one in an apple store even though I got one at home.

6.  Adele Frank Ocean

And everytime somebody asked me
If I sing songs to get at women, I say yeah
They say no fair no fair that’s cheating
I say shit, oh well, oh well

Had 2011 ended in May or June Adele would probably have held this spot, but damn ClearChannel has a way of making you loathe an artist’s work.

Odd Future is definitely reshaping what it means to be a celebrity or even a musician.  While entertaining I wouldn’t call most of them talented (though I would call them marketing/hype geniuses).

Save for Mr. Ocean.

It’s hard to put my finger on what it is exactly that draws me to his work.  He’s a genre bender like Kid Cudi and I think his unconventional approach is really accessible to a wide audience.  Voted as GQ’s rookie of the year I been trying to spread the gospel of Ocean but since he was on WTT I’d say the cat’s outta the bag.

Grab Nostalgia Ultra- it’s the best free thing I got all year.  Even Gizmodo thought so.

Sorry Adele!

5.  Blue Bottle Coffee

I’ve heard that when people try certain drugs for the first time, they spend the rest of their addicted days chasing that first good good high.

Celebrating my 1st wedding anniversary I took my wife to Chez Panisse in Berkeley.  They served us Blue Bottle with dessert.  I was hooked.  And Instagram told the rest of the story…

I even began brewing my own with the AeroPress and Chemex.  Dangerous!

4.  Basketball

Mostly for “burn the fat” reasons, 2011 saw me return to the basketball court on an actual consistent basis and rekindled the fire and love for the game.  Iron MWF.  Hoop Tues or Thurs.

There was also a championship win for the Yokogawa family.  I’m a Warriors fan but young Jerm got a ring w/ Dallas.

3.  Watch The Throne

Albums these days typically leak anywhere from 2 months to 2 weeks before their commercial release.  What had to be one of the most hotly anticipated albums of the year had me, and the rest of the world asking “yo man, that shit leak yet?”

It would not leak.

This was a monumental success considering the music industry had been flipped upside down thanks to file sharing services like Napster.  Jay and Ye were in control.

The album was worth the wait, and I was lucky enough to get a free copy of the album with each concert ticket purchased so I was able to share (legally) with John Jerm and Phil.  Lil Wayne’s album The Carter IV dropped that same month and WTT’s production and quality really made Weezy’s album seem lacking- unfinished.  Inferior.

Niggas in Paris was immediately far the standout track (2 days ago I heard it on Rock Station Live 105 which had me saying WTF! or WTT?)  Word was they played it 7+ times in LA and Vegas.  We’d only get 3 here in SJ.

They pretty much told the world we can do whatever we want on a record and you will love it.  I mean come one, a Blades of Glory sample?

I was able to grab some cool shots from their show and throw em on instagram:

Oh yeah, and Kanye rocked a leather kilt:

Recap:

2.  Instagram

If I could have only one app Instagram would be it.

Facebook has too much bitchin about bfs/neighbors/lines at safeway.

Oh you popped bottles last night?  COOL STORY BRO! (but I don’t need to see the pics)

If you log in and see it’s someone’s bday you feel like you HAVE to post on their wall.

Instagram takes a big fat axe to that bullshit.  Pics only.  I Love it.

1.  Africa

Africa.  Fucking Africa!!!

Later this month I’ll be taking on the cold hard streets of the Windy City with the bird.

I definitely want to make a stop at RSVP Gallery which was founded by Kanye West’s style advisor Virgil Abloh.

How does one even become a style adviser to Kanye West anyway?  That’s a pretty tough gig if you ask me.

Via Hypebeast

Undercrwn Run TMC Shirt

Brother Jerm’s basketball accumen never ceases to amaze me.  His knowledge spans space and time;  the 1990-1991 warriors, back when Jeremy was only 2-3 years old, found their way onto his radar.  The shirt he got me is so ill!

Sarunas!

Blue Lounge Mini Dock

Mom and pops know I’m a gadget junkie so they went and got me this really sleek travel charger dock:

No more putting my phone on the dirty hotel room floor!

Flipit USB Charger

There’s nothing worse than being at an airport when you need to charge your phone and all the outlets are taking.  Now I fret no more with the

Now they just need a gadget for this:

Oakley Frogskins

As I’ve noted:

Frogskins are a really dope frame because they are shaped in the traditional wayfarer shape, but are super light and balanced on your face compared to their Ray Bay brethren. On cold days you slide em in the soft case and throw em in your pocket, they’re light and durable and you hardly feel em there.

Frogskin #4 comes down the pike and what can I say, moms and pops have taste!

I’d go as far as to say that they are the most perfect glasses ever made.  Ya I said it! Hypebeast forum eat your face off…

Aerobie Squidgie Disc

You can never go wrong with getting me a Frisbee to get in touch with my inner white-boy, and John knows this!

I got the safety orange joint- now all I need is the dog that can easily catch frisbees.

Nike Air Total Foamposite Max (Tim Duncans)

Being the self-proclaimed god of Foamposites, John also smiled down upon me with these:

14 years? Damn!

It’s crazy to think that Tim Duncan is a 14 year NBA vet.  Big John hollered at me with the blacked out Duncan Foamposites (who are getting people beat up on the internets):

Lego Volkswagen T1 Camper Van

I’ve come into adulthood at the absolute right time- it is looked up as acceptable to play with toys as an adult.  As such, Wifey came through with the Lego T1 Camper Van:

We can build it together and imagine what it would be like living airstream life!

Lego is just a gateway drug

 Native X Marc Jacobs Jimmy Boots

Imagine waterproof crocs that actually look good.  Native has been making classic silhouettes of popular shoes from croc material and I have been eyeing them for a while.

A coated japanese denim upper and comfortable to boot.

Mikej had these joints packed for his European tour and I went to hoist them up and was surprised at just how light they are.  Perfect for travel, they will come in handy at the Chicago Winter Bird and I are about to brave.

And no Christmas would be complete without a Hello Kitty X Girl Skateboards Tee!! 

Thanks Everyone!